Control Freaks

August 2, 2024


"My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me. Yet they will by no means follow a stranger, but will flee from him, for they do not know the voice of strangers."1

Pastor Verne Arens writes how "he once knew someone who was a leader in the congregation. At one time or another he had filled most (if not all) of the important leadership positions in that church. More than that, however, oftentimes he was the one who would volunteer for those tough, dirty jobs that no one else wanted: washing dishes after a potluck supper, helping to teach the confirmation class, stacking shelves at the food bank.

"This is the kind of person you would like to clone and with whom you'd like to fill the congregation, right? Wrong! This person was a delight to have around until things didn't go his way, and then he was a nightmare: disruptive, divisive, even destructive. He didn't understand the meaning of community and was not a team player. And when (not for the first time) he and his wife climbed into their huff-mobile and drove away after some disagreement, the congregation finally had the good sense not to beg them to come back. Finally that congregation had learned to distinguish between the voice of a shepherd and the voice of a stranger."

Another description of this type of person is "a control freak." Sometimes, after a reasonable number of rebukes, the most loving thing we can do is to ask them to leave. As long as we keep giving in to them, we become a part of their sickness (insecurity). It's interesting to note that when they threw Jonah overboard, there was a great calm!

Suggested prayer, "Dear God, please grant that I will never be a control freak and thereby play the role of 'God' in other peoples' lives. If I ever am, please open my eyes to what I am doing and help me to change my ways. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus's name, amen."

1. John 10:27, 5 (NKJV).



 

Proverbs 14:15 Pt. 1

May 28, 2024

“Fools will believe anything, but the wise think about what they do.”

Proverbs 14:15 (NCV)

Every behavior is based on a belief.

If you act scared, it’s because you believe scary thoughts at that moment. If you act resentful, it’s because you believe you’ve been devalued, and so you’re going to defend yourself. If you’re acting prideful, it may be because you believe you’re not good enough, so you’re trying to compensate by being boastful.

If there is a behavior in your l...


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Self-Image Pt. 2

February 24, 2022

Self-Image

Pt. 2

Unfortunately, today it is fashionable to play the game of creating false impressions.  Sidney Jourard calls this the “poker game of society” in which we bluff one another with our multitude of masks.  This in turn creates a psychological curtain between people.  We enclose ourselves in protective armor and we learn to play the game of deception well.  The fear of letting oneself be known to others and perhaps experiencing their rejection, criticism, or even acceptance...


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Pray About the Problem

January 21, 2022

Pray to God About the Problem

·       “Is there anyone among you suffering?  Let him pray” (James 5:13).  We have countless illustrations of godly men and women in the Old Testament times going to God in a time of need.  These believers poured out their hearts to God for hour at a time, (as Jesus did in the garden of Gethsemane).  If we look carefully at the process and progress of these prayers, we often find that encouragement comes even during the prayer itself. The weak and distress...


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Self-Image Pt. 1

November 27, 2021

Self-Image

Pt. 1

He who hates himself, who does not have a proper regard for his own capacities … can have no respect for others; deep within himself he will hate his brothers when he sees in them his own marred image.

Joshua Liebman – Peace of Mind

·        How do you feel about yourself? When you look at yourself in a mirror, do you have a good feeling about the person you see?  Are you satisfied with who and what you are? Do you like yourself?

·        Maxwell Maltz says in Psyc...


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Who's Fit To Lead?

September 16, 2013

The Call of Gideon

·         The reinforce in our minds this absolutely essential truth of God’s sufficiency, let’s consider another man at the point of his call from God.  Remember the great battles that we waged and won by Gideon?  With a handful of men he “turned to fight the armies and the aliens.”  Was he always like that?  Bold, courageous, waxing valiant in a fight?

Hardly!

The Children of Israel were suffering under the hand of the Midianites.  They were hiding in dens a...


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How Do I Get Right With God? Simple Version

June 15, 2013

If you want to get right with God, here is a sample prayer. Remember, saying this prayer or any other prayer will not save you. It is only trusting in Christ that can save you from sin. This prayer is simply a way to express to God your faith in Him and thank Him for providing for your salvation. "God, I know that I have sinned against You and am deserving of punishment. But Jesus Christ took the punishment that I deserve so that through faith in Him I could be forgiven. I place my trust in...


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Prayer for Peace

May 4, 2012

Prayer for Peace

O God, you will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are fixed on you; for in returning and rest we shall be saved; in quietness and trust shall be our strength.




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The Natural Result of Being Filled

May 4, 2012

·        The natural result of being filled with God’s Spirit is the impulse to tell others of Christ.  If you have no desire to share Jesus, then your Christianity is very shallow.  You may hear people talk as if to help in various forms of missionary activity were a matter left to their own inclination.  It is not!  To help or not to help, to do nothing, leaving other people to work and give, shrugging off disinterestedness with a flippant, “Oh, my sympathies do not go in that directio...


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Manipulation

October 6, 2011

MANIPULATION:  Control Vs. Trust

·         Manipulation is rooted in pride and selfishness and involves viewing others as objects, not as individuals. It is an invasion of an individual’s dignity because it seeks to limit freedom through control. The tools of manipulation are position, power, deception, and distortion. The results, even if perceived as successful, are always a denigration of God’s best as the manipulative individual believes that they know more than God.

·         Scr...


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